Considering going private

I have met so many great people through my blog.  When you aren’t out and about much, that’s a big thing.  It’s my connection with the world.

Other than my many doctor appointments, you all are my social life!  Don’t say “That’s sad!” or you’re saying you all aren’t important and you are!

That said, I am thinking about taking my blog Private.  The only reason is this:  I made the mistake of using all of our first names in my blog.  And I have discovered that Ryan’s birth-mother is looking for him/us and I’m afraid she could find us through this blog.  Ryan has been having some problems recently and this is definitely not a good time for his birth-mother to make contact with him.

I haven’t been blogging as much lately because I’ve been trying to figure out what to do, but the wisest thing is to go Private.  I hope I won’t lose a lot of you.

Please let me know if you would like to follow my blog Privately and send me an email with your email address.  I won’t make the change until the end of the month, for those who don’t check blogs very frequently.

Oh, BOB!!!!

I haven’t been very good at writing on my blog lately and I’m very behind on reading blogs.  I follow so many of them that it takes a while to go through them all, especially if I leave comments.  Right now I am about 3 days behind so that’s…possibly impossible for me to catch up on.  But I will try.

The computer hasn’t been free for me to use very much lately and then when I can use it Ryan is wanting to talk to me.  I’m trying to be happy that my teenager wants to talk to me, but sometimes I wish I could be alone at the computer to concentrate.  Then, when I’m on the computer I’m trying to respond to emails, catch up on FB, catch up on the CF boards and encourage people there.  I wasn’t visiting there as often as I should and since Lauren died last week I’ve been trying to do better.  She was wonderful at encouraging people and I want to follow her example.

We’ve been going through some heavy and difficult stuff recently, but I’m not able to say more.  It’s just been…quite difficult and stressful.

I don’t have much time right now, but I thought I’d share a funny story featuring my goofy son.  He always is making me laugh.  His imagination knows no limits.

I had made some tuna salad and left the container on the counter while I was eating at the table.  Ryan walked into the room and over to the counter.

Ryan: “BOB!  Is that YOU?  Oh, BOB!  What has she done to you!”

Me:  What??

Ryan:  “Oh, Bob, I can’t believe you’re gone!  I can’t believe it’s come to this!”

He’s talking to the tuna fish, pretending he was on close terms with the tuna!

Then he get’s a fork out and takes a bite of “Bob”.

Guess he recovered from his grief quickly.

Favorite Lauren story

Lauren had a great sense of humor.  This was one of my favorite stories that she told.  I’ve laughed over it with several families members in the 2 years since she wrote it.

Something's Fishy

This afternoon I stopped at the pet store to pick up some food for my critters. I decided it was time to add some new fish to my aquarium. I purchased three blood fin tetras. The helpful salesclerk put them in the plastic baggie, squirted in some air and tied the top tightly with one of those itty bitty rubber bands that never seem to let go once they're on.
I proceeded to the counter to pay for my new fish. From there I drove to Target to get a b-day present for my sister. I didn't plan on being in there very long, but I didn't want to just leave the fish in the car. That seemed cruel. So I put the whole thing into my purse, which is one of those big tote-bag style numbers. What could it hurt, right?
As I was walking down the aisle of CDs looking for an Aerosmith album, I noticed that my hip felt moist. I was wearing a bulky sweater and a jacket, so I just assumed I was getting sweaty. Coming around the corner was a customer in one of those go-kart things, so I pulled my big purse closer to my body to allow her to pass. That's when I saw it--a small but steady trickle of water coming from the corner of my purse.
My initial thought was to abandon my shopping, run to the car and get home quickly before I had 3 tiny casualties on my hands (or, in my purse, rather.) That wouldn't solve the problem of the leaking bag, and I'd only end up making my car seat wet in the process. My next thought was to get a bucket or travel mug to put them in, but that seemed gross. The cup didn't seem like a bad idea, however.
I hot-footed it to the little concession area in the store and asked the clerk for just an empty cup with a lid. When she gave me a quizzical look I almost said "my water broke" which I'm sure would have made her look at me even more strangely. I held up the ever-shriveling bag that contained the fish and said "Please, I need a big cup! My fish are leaking!" She handed it over and pointed toward the counter where the lids, straws and napkins were kept.
Placing the cup on a table, I quickly but carefully struggled to pull that little rubber band off the baggie. Stupid rubber band! Finally, it came loose and I poured my 3 frightened fishies into the cup. As I fastened the lid securely in place, I noticed a woman watching me with quite an odd expression. She was probably wondering if she had in fact just witnessed a young woman pouring 3 fish into a soda cup. Her mouth was agape, so I decided to give her a good show. I grabbed a straw, unwrapped it, slid it into the cup and pretended to take a sip.
"Beats Starbucks any day," I commented as I walked past her.
She's probably still sitting there, eyes and mouth wider than a codfish.
Lauren

Lauren – When Someone We Love Dies

I've been thinking about Heaven a lot more lately. Maybe because of my slow decline with CF, I don't know, or because of losing people we love. This time on earth is really so short and just a stopping place. Eternity is what really counts and I trust everyone reading this is ready to face eternity.

A Christian should have a relationship with Jesus during their life and a longing to see Him some day. When that day comes, it is a wonderful thing for them. I've heard testimony by a few people who died for just a short bit of time and then were revived. These people were Christians and told of the overwhelming and unspeakable joy and peace they immediately felt. And warmth enveloping them.

When they got to Heaven's gates there were people waiting for them that had gone on before and great rejoicing over the person entering Heaven, and also rejoicing at the reuniting with the loved ones.

And they finally got to look into their Saviour's eyes and feel His love and presence in a new way. I believe that according to how they lived out their Christian life, they will hear God say "Well done, my good and faithful servant."

The streets will be gold and there will be bright light everywhere. There will be singing and peace and joy that we've never experienced before. No illness, no pain, no sadness, no tears. (No enzymes, no O2, no pills!!!)

When a person is experiencing such joy, peace and perfectness, why then do we wish for them to be back here? For us. We miss them. But while we miss them, we need to be happy for them. How can we be anything but happy for someone who has gone to such a perfect and wonderful place?

We love you, Lauren. You educated us, encouraged us, loved us here in the CF community. You had a strong faith and knew what you believed and why you believed it and you didn't sway from that.

I, personally, am going to miss you so much. Even though I know you wanted many more years with your wonderful Brad and your new niece and family, I know you are at peace and enjoying all that Heaven has to offer and enjoying your eternal rewards.

 

I won’t be the same without you.

April 28, 1980 – November 3, 2009

(Lauren was one of the CFers that I was the most close to.  She was amazing.  It’s so hard to believe that she is gone from us.  Just two years ago she was working and doing so well, with hardly any need for IV’s.  This last year she has really struggled and deteriorated.  She thought she had about another 10 years, but several months ago she realized she wouldn’t if she didn’t get a transplant, so she started that process so she would have more time with her husband.   But she ran out of time before she could get new lungs.

Our loss is Heaven’s gain.)

We found a cheaper solution!!!!

To rinse, we’d just flush!

Actually, the guy called and we’d still be out about $275 in labor on the Fisher and Paykel and the guy said he’d reduce the price on the board we need for the F&P by $50.  If we’re already out that much in labor, we decided to just FIX the washer we have and NOT buy a new one because we really can’t afford to be out the $275 PLUS the cost of a new washer.

So, the problem really is solved.

But the toilet would be so much cheaper!

“Around My House” pictures

 

My sleep last night was “bookended” with the first bookend being an asthma attack and the last bookend being the pain in my port area.  When my port pain woke me, I layed there for a while, hoping I could get back to sleep, but then got thinking about financial problems.  Well, THAT doesn’t relax you to go to sleep!  So I started thinking of you guys and my blog…and here I am!  lol

I’ve been more negligent about posting pictures in my posts lately.  When you don’t leave the house a lot, there isn’t anything new to take pictures of!  My son is past the stage of doing lots of cute things to photograph and I don’t think you want to see lots of pictures of him sitting at the computer or riding his scooter!

I decided to get out of bed at 6AM this morning and photograph some random peeks around my house for you.

Here is my pile of laundry.

Can you see it?

I don’t usually have that white laundry basket sitting in our jetted tub.  I was afraid it would topple over and kill the repairman in the avalanche, so I moved it to the tub.  But I had to move it in sections because it’s too heavy to lift!  (And I don’t usually have a eucalyptus wreath in the tub…the humidity made color run off it down the wall yesterday, so I quickly put it there until it dried out.)

Leaving our bedroom is this:

I love the wreath, purchased when we lived in PA still. (As was most everything we have.)

Jim’s gift to me last Christmas:

And lest you think our house is all neat and tidy:

This pile has been sitting on top of here for WEEKS.  I really need to do something with it!

Hey, thanks for visiting!  And thanks for your input on washers!

(You know, I like Windows Live Writer, but I don’t like how the pictures are smaller and off to the side.  I’ll have to work on a solution.)

Need your opinion

Here we go again.  Maybe I should rename this blog.  Something like “What’s Your Take?” or “Reviews R Us”.

Today the washer repairman came.  2 1/2 hrs late.  I need 2 parts for our ailing Fisher and Paykel washer, to the tune of a little over $400.  My husband said to go ahead, but they had to get the one part so rescheduled for tomorrow AM.

After advice from my sister (Thanks, Kathi!) and some research I did, I cancelled the repair appt. and am shopping for a new washer.  We don’t have much of a budget, in order to justify not eating the cost of the repairs.  Actually, we have no budget for it, but that’s beside the point.

So, again, what brand washer do you favor?  What features are most important to you?  We are leaning toward Maytag or Whirlpool, which are owned by the same company.  And I want a High Energy Top-Loader, for sure.

I’m so stressed.  I feel like I’m inside with the agitator.   I can’t handle any more problems.  I’m at my limit.  The financial stress is about to finish me off.

Calgon, take me away!  And take my piles and piles of dirty laundry, too!